Why It's So Important To Cry (and scream!) - G's Tips for Rebuilding

How releasing emotions can keep us physically healthy

Feb 13, 2025

person crying beside bed — Photo by Claudia Wolff on Unsplash

"If the mind is forced to silence its pain, the body will find a way to express it." — Bessel van der Kolk (The Body Keeps the Score)

We often think of emotions as something separate from our physical health, but they’re deeply connected.

The truth is, when we suppress our emotions, whether it’s grief, anger, or stress, our bodies don’t just forget about them.

They hold onto them, sometimes for many years, and that emotional weight can start showing up in the form of tension, chronic pain, fatigue, and illness.

In her book Your Body Speaks Your Mind, Deb Shapiro says, "The body shows us what we are unconsciously ignoring, denying, or repressing."

This means that if we don’t allow ourselves to process emotions, to release them, our bodies might step in and express them for us, through headaches, digestive issues, muscle tension, or even more serious health conditions.

"What the mind suppresses, the body expresses." — Deb Shapiro (Your Body Speaks Your Mind)

Science backs this up. Research has shown that long-term emotional distress can weaken the immune system, increase inflammation, and even raise the risk of heart disease.

Holding in anger or sadness doesn’t make it disappear, it just redirects itself into the body in ways we might not immediately recognise.

But there is good news: letting emotions out can be incredibly healing, not just mentally, but physically.

Studies have found that something as simple as journaling about our feelings can lower stress and improve overall well-being.

Crying releases oxytocin and endorphins, chemicals that help relieve pain and promote a sense of calm.

I experienced this about a year after my marriage ended. I woke up one day with terrible back pain. So bad that I thought I should see a doctor about it.

I was sitting on the sofa, feeling sad and in pain. For some reason, I picked up a photo album off the shelf that my daughters had made us for what became our last wedding anniversary together.

As I looked at all our beautiful family photos I started to cry, and as I thought of how broken my beautiful family now was, the tears and pain just poured out of me. I sank to the floor and lay curled up in a ball sobbing and howling with the despair I was feeling.

As I calmed down, I suddenly realised that my back pain was gone. Not just a bit better but actually gone!

It was a powerful lesson to me of how I had been holding the pain and sadness inside me. It had manifested into back pain like I’d never experienced before, but all I needed to do to feel better was to let it go.

Talking about emotions, moving our bodies, or even creative expression can all help us process what we’re carrying inside.

If you’ve ever noticed how much lighter you feel after a good cry, a deep conversation, or even a long walk where you let yourself think and feel, that’s your body working with you.

Releasing emotions isn’t weakness—it’s strength.

It’s self-care in its most essential form.

If you’re holding onto something, maybe it’s time to let it out.

Your mind, your heart, and your body will thank you for it.

In my book I talk about the healing toolkit that I used to go from being utterly broken and lost to rebuilding my life. A life that I love and am proud to live. My method isn’t complicated or expensive, it’s very simple and gets amazing results.